If I pass away...

I was just thinking, what if something suddenly happens to me and I am dead (literally). People around me will be so anxious and my family might not know how I will want my funeral to be held. So in case anything happens, I better write a will now. =]

The Funeral

1. Casket
Get me a white casket please.

I thought a white casket will be quite cool as compared to the all-so-common brown ones. =) And make it comfy with lots of cushion.. :]

And I choose cremation. I dunwan to rot.


2. The Chantings
My passport says I am a Taoist but I have no idea what its about actually. I wonder what my funeral will be like but from past experiences, I know there will be chantings. But, please, I don't really like chantings because I don't understand what the priests are saying at all. (is it really meant for me to listen?)

Just come forward and have a look at me and tell me what you want to say just like when I am alive. I think I will appreciate that more than endless amitaba...

In fact, I hope that there can be speakers blasting songs by my favourite singers.

HOWEVER, if the chantings can get me to heaven or stop me from going to hell, then do it! I will be so afraid if I can't go to heaven... T_T


3. Make-up
Please make me look yandao and dashing when I am dead. I don't care how ugly or fugly I looked when I was alive, but put on branded makeup or perform plastic surgery and get David Gan to style me a nice hairstyle. Then fit me into a branded suit which I might never had got a chance to wear. Then put some casual clothes beside so I can wear them after I arrive at heaven. =D


4. My friends and classmates
Most probably you all will come down and pay me the last respect I believe. (Right?) Because the school will most probably be passing around the news that I passed away, and you all will decide, "hey, lets go for his funeral". Dun think anyone will cry for my death, so just come down and have fun. But don't poke fun of my photo or anything.. that is so bad.



My Inheritance
Please dun fight for my inheritance. It won't be nice.

Anyway, I am left with only a few hundred in my bank account. Since it won't be of any use to me anymore, I suggest a part of it being spent on hell papers for me.

For the remaining money, you all can fight it for yourself. For my elder brother, you may use it to buy a new Mp3 player or clothes or computer parts. For my second brother, you may use them to pay your debts. But if you dun quit your habit, then **** you. For my parents.. hmm... use it for a holiday or something. I dun think our family has ever went for a vacation.. but the measly sum should be enough for you two to go for a Malaysia trip or sth..

And ya! My Btw, no need to level for me anymore since IJinheritance in maple! wont get to see my rifie anymore. Maple mates you all can use the money if its urgent. Then throw away the money 10mesos at a time for the noobs. =) ya tts all


When I am in the urn

1. My Family
I guess I will be so bored at the far faraway place. I might not meet anyone. I may find my grandparents but I dun think we will have much to talk about. I may reincarnate into a much cuter baby. I may become an angel and fly around heaven shooting arrows.

But in case its really damn boring, I will appreciate if I can enjoy what I used to enjoy when I was alive. =D

a. Music
I dunwan to miss new releases by my favourite singers! Please get the CDs and place it in front of my tablet asap. Then make sure a cd player is placed somewhere else how am I gg to listen to it. (?!) Anyway, I doubt those paper-made mp3 players really work.. lol.

If buying the CD is too expensive, hmm, you can do what I always do... go and download them. The site that I frequent is www.cdjmp3.com. If that dun work, go find it in forums. If still cant be found, then go to baidu.com and search. -_- Then you can load it into my ipod and I will become the happiest angel in heaven.

Btw, albums not to be missed are those from stefanie sun, jay chou, and many others that I used to listen. Dun miss any or I will make sure I haunt you.

b. TV
Some television shows are not to be missed. Those Taiwan variety shows that I used to watch so much... nice drama serials... and those misc. shows like national day parade and countdown parties, and documentary on air crashes and da vinci code... Hmm, so I will request that the television be turned on during these shows. =)



Else, I will turn it on myself and you dun cry.

c. Books, Newspapers, Magazines
It will be nice if bestseller books are burnt for me as I can pass time with it. I will also want to be informed about current issues and entertainment news so throw in some newspapers and magazines too... and I mean magazines of all sorts. ;D

But please.





NO LECTURE NOTES NO TUTORIALS NO SCHOOL RELATED BOOKS OR PAPERS. I will throw them back at you if I see any of these.

2. My Friends
I dun expect much from my friends and classmates actually. If you have the time, feel free to come to my urn (what do you actually call that box area???), then chit chat with me and tell me about your lives. Stuff like getting a stead or failing a test or scandals passing around. I will be excited to listen!

And if you have not forgotten me, come back when you are getting married, having your first child etc. Come and chat with me more and I will try my best to give you my support... Like helping you answer your mcq during tests, making it rain when you are late, making sure your scrolls pass and stuff like that. I will be your guardian angel and always be by your side! =)

I feel so bad demanding so much when I am dead.. -_- So I just hope that at least you all will remember me.. or miss me =D. Just find a place in your heart and place me inside. haha


My Regrets
If I am to die now.. I will be regretting so much... Here are those that I can think of:

1. Not saving myself from dying
2. Not trying bungee jumping, parachuting, roller coaster,...
3. Not flying on the big fat A380 plane!
4. Not getting a girlfriend and loving her so much
5. Not finding true love
6. Dying as a virgin
7. Not getting married
8. Not knowing what it will feel like to be a father. And grandfather and great grandfather and ...
9. Not shaking Stefanie Sun's hands
10. Not stepping into society and owning everyone and earning big bucks
11. Not giving my parents a better life and save them from working like slaves
12. Not explaining to everyone that I had offended how I never meant to say what I said
13. Not complaining that I did not want to die so young..
14. Not telling my family how I care for each and everyone of them
15. Not telling my family that how I hope life was simple like when I was young
16. Not telling my mother that I still remember minor details when I was a child, like accompanying her during mahjong sessions and hugging her during a thunderstorm
17. Not telling my parents how it pains to see them getting older each day
18. Not being able to console people who are saddened by my death and wipe away the tears they had shed

And lastly, not telling everyone that life does have a meaning and to live life to the fullest and do not have regrets like I had...

.
.
.



I am not dead yet, guys. Maybe you hope so but no im not.
this thing wasted me 2hours.. -_-

What I want to say is that death is not as scary as it seems. Its the people that mourns for your death and missing you every night before they sleep tt really saddens a dead person. So give all you have while you can and enjoy your freaaking short lifetime. =)